A Father Provides

I recently accepted a new job. I love talking about books and selling books to people, so I’m moving on from the retail end of things to the distribution end of things at a world-wide publisher.

There’s that and the chance to make more money. As the father of the household I feel great pressure to bring in the money for my family. One of my goals is to be able to pay for my children’s college education. And before that, I would love to bring enough home, so my wife could work part-time and be home with our daughter. Focusing on the now, I’m trying to just balance the budget.

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Spiritual teachers talk about God providing or that the Universe will give us what we need. What’s the address of the scripture mentioning the inability to worship God and mammon? (Matthew 6:24) I struggle with this, mainly because I already think I know what I need. I need a six-figure income. I need a SUV hybrid. I need to remodel my bathroom.

But none of those things are happening right now. And truly nothing is more important than health:  mental, physical and spiritual. I guess God is giving me what I need right now.  I feel the healthiest I’ve ever been. I just need to open my eyes and see it. I need patience. I need gratitude. I need to learn how to budget accordingly and enjoy the things I have. I could use some extra sleep.

Joel Osteen’s newest book, The Power of I Amhe talks about moving along different tiers. He discusses the idea of being content where I am in order to move to the next “tier” of my journey.

That’s an interesting thought. I’ve been through the job transitions previously. Twice in the past five years actually, but one internal promotion situation in particular comes to mind prior to the two job transitions. I was really gunning for the director position. I had worked hard at the various marketing positions in the company, and I was positive my time had come to take over the department. I wasn’t happy at the previous positions, but I was sure that the new position of authority would bring me the happiness I was seeking.

When it came time to interview for the position, and my boss at the time explained why he didn’t see me in the position, I let him know my feelings on this. I let him know why I was exactly the person he was looking for to make things happen at the organization. And after I stormed out of his office with tears of frustration swelling. Yeah, I showed him.

It actually worked. The squeaky wheel does get the grease. I received the promotion I wanted. Or at least the promotion I thought I wanted.This increased my pay and gave me power. However, I still wasn’t happy.

I wasn’t content at either tier, so eventually, after another year and a half of struggling effort on my behalf, my position was eliminated at the company. God took away the tier.

I am still learning to be happy where I am. A beautiful wife. Two health children. Gainfully employed. A roof over my head and two working cars. And I’m still working on being content. More often than not I am. Just get me to the next tier? The truth is I don’t know where the money is going to come from to pay for two kids in full-time daycare. I don’t know how I’d make a car payment for a larger car.

All I know how to do is put one foot in front of the other and continue to ask for His help. Thy will be done. So help me God.

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